The value of tidying up
Several times in the past week the issue of how to make children tidy up has risen so I thought what better than to write a tip on it. Many parents seem to really struggle with this, and it is really interesting talking to different parents as there
are a number of different expectations placed on children in relation to it as well.
You need to establish how often you want your children to tidy up and how bigger task it is for them to do.
Many parents vary on this – I have walked into homes where they are totally immaculate and the parents are having issues with their children not tidying up – it is very evident right from the start that the parents’ expectations are far too high and there is no way a child will be able to tidy up to the expected standard set by the parent. Then there are other houses where children are expected to tidy up but there is no set place for things to be put, just pushed into a corner, or lots of different places. What is this telling the child?
It may be necessary for some parents to change their view on what tidy looks like and how to tidy up the house. If you have really high expectations, then consider how old your children are and what ability they have. Perhaps your house doesn’t have to be perfect all the time! After all a messy house is often a happy house.
Once you have established how often – hopefully only once a day, your child will need to tidy their toys, then you can move onto some strategies to encourage your child tidy up.
Give the child a warning that in say 5 minutes it will be time to tidy up. It might be necessary for you to make this easier by moving the bins the toys are going to go into, more accessible. When it is time, tell your child, “It is time for you to tidy up now as it is ....” It is important to give them a reason why they need to tidy up. Start by helping them and making the exercise into a game. It might be that you are going have turns at putting things away, putting things away in set colours, sizes etc. By making it a game it is more exciting and the whole mundane exercise of tidying up turns into another activity. Give praise continually while they are putting things away. If they get distracted, then remind them that it is tidy up time and not play time. Suggest they may like to play with that tomorrow. Once your children are competent at tidying up you may be able to leave them to achieve the task or part of it on their own.
Notice I have talked about the adult helping. This is so you are modelling to the child how to do it. If the child sees you tidying up then they are more likely to help than if you stand back and give orders. Besides you are a great parent, so you would have been sitting playing with them with some of the toys throughout the day anyway, so some of it is your
mess. Once all is tidied up, give a 'high five' to acknowledge the great job.
I know that getting children to tidy up can be a really stressful and frustrating time, so hopefully these strategies will make it less of a little and more fun. Good luck.
Copyright © Nelson District Kindergarten Association 2014 – not to be disseminated to organisations outside the Associations Kindergartens, Centres, and Management Contracts, unless by signed contract.
are a number of different expectations placed on children in relation to it as well.
You need to establish how often you want your children to tidy up and how bigger task it is for them to do.
Many parents vary on this – I have walked into homes where they are totally immaculate and the parents are having issues with their children not tidying up – it is very evident right from the start that the parents’ expectations are far too high and there is no way a child will be able to tidy up to the expected standard set by the parent. Then there are other houses where children are expected to tidy up but there is no set place for things to be put, just pushed into a corner, or lots of different places. What is this telling the child?
It may be necessary for some parents to change their view on what tidy looks like and how to tidy up the house. If you have really high expectations, then consider how old your children are and what ability they have. Perhaps your house doesn’t have to be perfect all the time! After all a messy house is often a happy house.
Once you have established how often – hopefully only once a day, your child will need to tidy their toys, then you can move onto some strategies to encourage your child tidy up.
Give the child a warning that in say 5 minutes it will be time to tidy up. It might be necessary for you to make this easier by moving the bins the toys are going to go into, more accessible. When it is time, tell your child, “It is time for you to tidy up now as it is ....” It is important to give them a reason why they need to tidy up. Start by helping them and making the exercise into a game. It might be that you are going have turns at putting things away, putting things away in set colours, sizes etc. By making it a game it is more exciting and the whole mundane exercise of tidying up turns into another activity. Give praise continually while they are putting things away. If they get distracted, then remind them that it is tidy up time and not play time. Suggest they may like to play with that tomorrow. Once your children are competent at tidying up you may be able to leave them to achieve the task or part of it on their own.
Notice I have talked about the adult helping. This is so you are modelling to the child how to do it. If the child sees you tidying up then they are more likely to help than if you stand back and give orders. Besides you are a great parent, so you would have been sitting playing with them with some of the toys throughout the day anyway, so some of it is your
mess. Once all is tidied up, give a 'high five' to acknowledge the great job.
I know that getting children to tidy up can be a really stressful and frustrating time, so hopefully these strategies will make it less of a little and more fun. Good luck.
Copyright © Nelson District Kindergarten Association 2014 – not to be disseminated to organisations outside the Associations Kindergartens, Centres, and Management Contracts, unless by signed contract.